09 Sep Pitfalls and Pieces of Advice for a Successful Second Marriage
After your marriage has been dissolved and the property, child custody, and child support have been divided, it may seem like there will never be a time will you ever will seek the happiness from marriage again. But lo and behold, many meet another individual that seems perfect sometime later, and they begin to consider the possibility of marriage for a second time.
The Effect of Second Marriage on Men and Women
The concept of second marriage can bring chills to someone who has gone through not only a first marriage but an acrimonious first divorce. There have been several studies that have left many wondering whether a second marriage will boost or harm them as a result. One of the studies recently published stated that those who are married are more likely to be healthier than those who are divorced and single since the fact that you are living your life not only for yourself but another person would lead you to choose a healthier lifestyle as a result. Another study, however, published by Daily Mail, found that men who were in a second marriage were a third more likely to be taking antidepressants than those who were still in their first marriage or single after their first marriage.
The Study: A Third of Remarried Men are On Antidepressants
The study reviewed 200,000 Swedish men born between 1952 and 1956, and by the time these men were 30, at least 72,000 had been divorced. The study then went on to track the depression rates of the men who remained single and those who remarried later. The men who remarried were more likely to be depressed due possibly to difficulties related to the remarriage such as attempting to get along with their stepchildren or financial problems relating to child support and spousal maintenance from the first marriage. Also, a possibility suggested by the main researcher posited that people may rush into the second marriage to seek happiness after the end of the first marriage.
How to Avoid the Pitfalls of Second Marriage
Those that do decide to enter into a second marriage should not automatically assume it is doomed, however. There are just more considerations and steps that should be taken to ensure that many of the problems related to second marriage are attacked at the start. Here are some of the following tips to help bolster the second marriage for success:
- Learn from your previous marriage’s mistakes. If you can pinpoint what went wrong in the first marriage, you may be able to save yourself the heartache in the second. Having a clear understanding of how you perform as a spouse may help you be aware of negative behavior that could filter into your second marriage. If your first spouse believes you were too closed off, it would behoove of you to figure out why you acted this way and what steps are needed to be more open in your second relationship.
- Tackle the residual issues left over from the first marriage and understand how to take on issues that may result in the second marriage. For example, there will usually be financial obligations, such as child support and spousal maintenance that will be added to your bill every month and will bleed into your second marriage. Figure out how to deal with those financial obligations. Also, entering into a second marriage means your spouse may have his/her own first marriage issues, so it’s important to understand how to blend those, especially if there are stepchildren to be concerned about.
- Figure out your role in a blended family. Are you going to be involved in your stepchildren’s life? Should your spouse be involved in your children’s lives? Figure out each role early to limit tension and potential conflict.
Finally, the following includes some last tips of advice to ensure a smooth transition:
- Decide on whether there should be a prenuptial agreement
- Update your wills to include each other and your blended families
- Be fully open about your all of your obligations, financial and otherwise
Family Law Attorneys Can Help
An experienced family law attorney at Klok Law Firm LLC can provide guidance on several ways to legally protect yourself before saying “I do” a second time. Contact Klok Law Firm LLC today for a free and confidential consultation.