Are Helicopter and Tiger Parents Abusive?

Are Helicopter and Tiger Parents Abusive?

Being a parent is never easy. There are thousands of books, newspaper articles, and blogs devoted to certain parenting styles that are thought to be the most constructive for child development. There are several types of parenting styles that have been considered to be in vogue these days. For example, parents can be free-range parents, tiger parents, helicopter parents, indulgent parents, etc. While parents have relative freedom to rule the roost as they believe fits with the best development style for their children, it may be possible that certain extreme parenting styles may actually harm their children to the point where the parenting styles may even be considered abusive.

 Helicopter and Tiger Parents

Helicopter and tiger parents are considered to be the most extreme styles of parenting. Helicopter parents are the type that get overly involved in their children’s lives and provide a significant amount of support while very rarely allowing the children to learn for themselves how the world works. Tiger parents are similar to helicopter parents where they do get overly involved, but tiger parents expect that their children must be obedient high achieving, and perfect in every way.

The Effects of these Parenting Styles on Children

While parenting styles are very much up to the preference of the parents, studies have shown that helicopter and tiger parents may actually be psychologically and emotionally stunting their children. With regards to overly burdensome helicopter parents, it was found that the children of overprotective parents were more likely to be the victims of bullying at school and more likely to be depressed.

Helicopter Parenting Effects

A recent study found that children of helicopter parents had a difficult time getting along with other students, they felt less capable and competent in themselves, they were more likely to be anxious, stressed, and depressed, and they were less likely to be satisfied in their lives. Overall, the study reflected a correlation between feelings of competency and contentment with increased autonomy. The more the child perceived he or she had less autonomy; the more likely the feelings of stress, incompetency, and depression pervaded the child.

Tiger Parenting: Examples and Consequences

With tiger parenting, the parents expect children to be above average and perfect in any and every way. Failure is not permitted and at times, tiger parents promote extreme punishment and verbal abuse as the means to raise perfect children. In the book written by self-proclaimed tiger mom Amy Chua, she described examples where to be effective, she called her two daughters words like “disgusting”, “worthless”, and “garbage” so as to inspire them to be better. She forced one of her children to stay up all night practicing the piano, without water or bathroom breaks. She also threatened to take away meals and holidays for years unless the daughter continued playing the piano. Though parental rights are sacred, these examples could make Social Services in any other circumstance ready to pay the family a visit.

In a recent study evaluating children from tiger parents, it was demonstrated that the children, like the children of helicopter parents, had high levels of depression and anxiety, and had serious self-esteem issues. This comes as no surprise when many of the children are bombarded with verbal abuse and pressure to perform.

Experienced Family Law Attorneys in Mount Pleasant, Charleston Area

While parenting styles are fundamental rights, it is important that children are not abused as a result of an extreme parenting style. If you believe your ex-spouse’s parenting style is creating a psychological and emotional damage to your child, it is important to speak with the experienced family law attorneys at Klok Law Firm LLC. Contact these attorneys for an initial and confidential consultation.