17 Oct Tips for Surviving a High Conflict Divorce
Divorce is never pretty, but some are uglier than others. If you and your spouse are having trouble being in the same room or speaking to each other civilly, you may be setting yourself up for a long and miserable process. High conflict divorce is painful, time-consuming, and expensive for everyone, including your children. While cooperation is the key to a happy divorce, this is not always possible. If you believe you are headed for a nasty divorce, find out what you can do to complete the process—unscathed.
Request a Protective Order if Necessary
Sometimes a relationship becomes so toxic, the couple can no longer be together safely. Orders of protection, also called restraining orders, exist to prevent contact between two parties when one is a danger to the other. If your soon-to-be ex is harassing, threatening, or putting hands on you, it is time to get a restraining order as soon as possible. The court and your attorneys can work around a protective order to handle divorce and child custody proceedings and supervise visitation drop-offs, if necessary. Remember that orders of protection should be reserved for situations in which someone poses a real threat to you. Requesting a restraining order to gain an advantage in divorce or child custody matters is unethical, unlawful, and will most likely backfire.
Do Not Share an Attorney with Your Spouse
Some couples are able to pursue a collaborative divorce, in which one attorney assists both spouses in dissolving their marriage. Unfortunately, this is not a good option for a high conflict divorce. While utilizing the same legal counsel cuts down on overall cost, a single attorney cannot adequately represent both your and your spouse’s interests when one is trying to bury the other.
Combat Lies with Detailed Records
Some people will try to get what they want in the divorce by telling lies and making false accusations. If this sounds like your spouse, be prepared to defend yourself with solid evidence. Keep records of all correspondence, receipts, personal observations, and even witness accounts that may be relevant to your case. Fortunately, judges are very good at sensing deceitful behavior and do not take kindly to it in court.
Be the Bigger Person
When your ex is playing dirty, you may be tempted to fight fire with fire. However, these tactics rarely work in court. Stooping to your spouse’s level only makes you look just as bad. Be civil to your spouse, especially around your children, and tell the truth in court.
Call a Divorce Lawyer ASAP
When divorce looks inevitable, it is important to speak with an attorney as soon as possible. An experienced divorce attorney will be able to advise you on the best course of action to protect yourself from a spiteful ex during a high conflict divorce. The attorneys at Klok Law Firm LLC are dedicated to helping you through this difficult time. Contact our office in Mt. Pleasant, South Carolina to schedule an appointment.