30 Jan Coping with Divorce for Men – Challenges & Expectations
Divorce is rough for everyone involved – men, women, kids, and even the attorneys who represent them. In particular, research tends to show that men coping with divorce generally fare negatively, and it’s not just the legal terms of a divorce that disproportionately affect men. In many cases, divorce can lead to changes in health.
Loss Of Relationship With Children
At the top of the list is the loss of relationships that men have with young children. National Parents Organization reports that despite movements in the right direction, courts still tend to favor awarding primary custody of children to women. Of course, this may not be so much an issue of gender bias as it is a product of a society where men are the higher-earning members of the household. Judges are focused on making sure the children have it as good as possible. By this logic, if dad earns more, he should be working to support the children. This leaves the mother to provide the personal care. It may not always be the right arrangement, but it seems to be a common outcome.
While Huffington Post recently reported that this may be changing rapidly, it seems for now the status quo still impacts a large percentage of divorced men. And when men go from seeing their young children daily to seeing them just once or twice per month, both mental and physical health can be adversely affected.
Diminished Physical & Mental Health
As discussed in Harvard Men’s Health Watch, a study that spanned nine years and followed 10,904 American men found that divorced men were 37 percent more likely to die prematurely than their married counterparts. Divorce often results in not just a lack of interest in healthy diet and exercise, but it can also lead to depression and feelings of inadequacy. These feelings often translate to poor sleep, careless or dangerous thrill-seeking behaviors, or increased alcohol or tobacco consumption. A University of Arizona study even connected post-divorce insomnia with increased rates of male hypertension.
Together with the anxiety of financial stress, men coping with divorce simply have worse health outcomes.
Decreased Earnings Are A Risk
As you can probably tell, much of what impacts men following a divorce is ‘self-inflicted.’ It’s a sort of cycle effect. Emotional and financial stress lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms that, in turn, lead to more financial and emotional stress. When you don’t get the sleep you need, and you are worried about having enough income to pay child support, alimony, and your own living expenses, it can certainly lead to decreased productivity at work. This may be why many divorced men see fewer promotions than married counterparts.
Having An Ally During Your Divorce
For men coping with divorce, having an experienced divorce lawyer on your side can offer peace of mind. If you are a man facing divorce, remember to focus on staying fit and healthy. Eat well, take care of yourself, get regular check-ups, go to the dentist, get your hair cut regularly, remember to exercise, and do not allow yourself to fall into the trap of despair.
Remember that millions of people get divorced. For the most part, they can move on, live happy lives, and remain involved with their children. The attorneys of Klok Law Firm LLC are ready to help. Divorce is never easy, but having the right advice from the start can make all the difference. Contact us today for help.